“Your kids would have some good hair!”
How many times has someone proclaimed this to women when they show up at a party with friends or to a family event with a curly-haired beau? For me, more than I can count.
It was in fact the first thing my mom ever proclaimed about the first boyfriend I ever had. That our hypothetical children would “have some good hair.” Good hair would be curly or wavy, easy to comb, no kinks in sight. No nappy-haired grandkids in sight. What a blessing! While it is something mothers, grandmothers, and aunts proclaim, we cannot pretend that it is not something we have thought about or noticed. Hair is a physical characteristic and just like anything else, we notice it when sizing up a partner.
Before we go further, let’s be clear about who exactly would provide a lady with some offspring with “good hair” and who would not.
Now that we have established what is the what, the big question is do women of today still believe the hype. Unfortunately, the answer is yes. I speak with endless amounts of young people who still believe a man with good hair will provide them with better looking children. Or even treat them better. The stereotypes are endless. Worse still, there is the overt colorism that often follows this notion of good hair. For some, “If it ain’t light, it ain’t right.” This carries over to hair of course and the wide belief that lighter black men are more likely to have curly/wavy hair and darker skin men are more likely to have kinky hair.
The message here is be the change you want to see. If you remember your mama or someone else saying any of the above to you, flip the script when you have your own children, don’t indulge in good hair talks when talking about the opposite sex. It all starts in the womb! When you are pregnant, don’t ponder what kind of hair your child will have with friends and family. It’s not a worry!